Where all Asian Fans Unite
HomePortalGalleryFAQSearchRegisterMemberlistUsergroupsLog in

Share | 

 thank you for the vnom part one

Go down 
stay at home KiD
stay at home KiD

Number of posts : 3
Registration date : 2008-01-07

PostSubject: thank you for the vnom part one   Sat Jan 12 2008, 04:42

ring ring hello says meli. hey dude wanna come with us to this new bar vamp says melis friend asks.no its gerard came back from touring yesterday and i want to be with him.vamp says on the other line ok then bye. ok then vamp says to her friend its just us going to the the new bar.shes says to her friends nini and bri. the bars name was junkyard due to the drunks that went. so the girls go in and order a couple of drinks. they all get very drunk and get kicked out in less than 3 hrs. the owner told them if they cant be quite then they has to go so they all left. the owner name was david reed . so the girls get in the car and talk forever to drive out so david get his pistol and kills them them all. he calls the cops and says its a muder the cops belived him.this all went on the news hrs later. back with meli and gerard they go to lay down on their huge couch hopeing to wacth a movie intesd they wacth the news. breaking news today three ppl found dead in their near the junkyard bar. their names were vamp nini and brit . meli sees this and cant belive what she is hearing she begins to cry. gerard panics too cuz he knew them very cuz of meli. he trys to comfort her but doesnt know . meli trys to herad to the door in rage hopeing to get a answer but gerard stops her .meli still crys and gerard hugs her untill he know s she be fine . meli calm down after a couple of hrs and gerard gives her a sleeping pill so she can relax from the ugly thing she had just heard . they both sleep in peace untill the new comes .

this the frist chapter tell me what u think. i have a lot to writ so be pacint with me ill do number 2 hopefully tomarro. leave comments thank you.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Sleepwalking into Gee's hands
Sleepwalking into Gee's hands

Number of posts : 1700
Age : 30
Location : In Gerard's hands
Registration date : 2007-12-28

PostSubject: Re: thank you for the vnom part one   Sat Jan 12 2008, 05:40

It seems like an interesting story but it will be more readable if you use proper punctuations ,grammar and spellings. Smile

I hate the ending myself, but it started with an alright scene...
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://of-silverandsky.blogspot.com/
thank you for the vnom part one
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
» Stone Love: Old Gold Part 8
» Jah Shaka vs Coxsone vs Stereograph Brixton 81 Part 2
» Mott The Hoople Discography
» waggy Tee Dead & Gone artists plus more Part 1

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
My Chemical Romance Asia Forum :: MCR Asia Forum :: Fan Fiction-
Jump to: